These will give you a few chuckles:
"You're working hard to put food on your family."
"[T]he illiteracy level of our children are appalling"
"Rarely is the question asked: is our children learning?"
"You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test."
"Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB/GYN's aren't able to practice their love with women all across the country"
"I'm honored to shake the hand of a brave Iraqi citizen who had his hand cut off by Saddam Hussein."
"I'm not gonna fire a $2 million missile at a $10 empty tent and hit a camel in the butt."
"It's a time of sorrow and sadness when we lose a loss of life."
"Our country puts $1 billion a year up to help feed the hungry. And we're by far the most generous nation in the world when it comes to that, and I'm proud to report that. This isn't a contest of who's the most generous. I'm just telling you as an aside. We're generous. We shouldn't be bragging about it. But we are. We're very generous"
"There's an old saying in Tennessee—I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee—that says, fool me once, shame on—shame on you. Fool me—you can't get fooled again."
"It is not pollution that is ruining the earth. It is impurities in the water and air."
"I always jest to people, the Oval Office is the kind of place where people stand outside, they're getting ready to come in and tell me what for, and they walk in and get overwhelmed by the atmosphere. And they say 'man, you're looking pretty.' "
"They misunderestimated me"
"I think it was in the Rose Garden where I issued this brilliant statement: If I had a magic wand -- but the president doesn't have a magic wand. You just can't say, 'low gas.'"
"Soldiers, sailors, Marines, airmen, and Coastmen -- Coast Guardmen, thanks for coming, thanks for wearing the uniform."
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